Jalan Jalan Kehidupan: Am Singing a Different Song

 Bismillah ir-Rahman ir-Rahim

I am not singing a sad song. FACT number 1, I realised all of a sudden, thanks to a friend who reminded me of how sad I was 2 years back by telling me, hmmm…your nasty ex has become a father, are you sad? And I smiled, and said nope, am actually happy for him. And thank You Allah, Alhamdulillah, I am finally freed of all the sadness that had been haunting me for at least, yup…2 long years. I am breathing the sweetness air of being able to smile at the thought of how silly I was to have fallen for the wrong side of the world. 

Everything that happened 2 years back had really changed me. That is the FACT number 2. Am loving it. I still loves listening to rock music and despise love songs that are truly a lie to me; and I still thinks Ville Valo is gorgeous and he is not faking it; and I still fancies the colour red eventhough red is already outdated; and I still loves cooking for others eventhough every dishes that I cook is according to what I felt like having, myself…ahahhah!; and I still hate winter and I still am for the rest of my life. So, what are the changes? I am still who I am.

One great thing that I realised is, when I felt lost, Allah is always with me. When I am sad, Allah gives me strength and courage. When I felt weak to face the world, Allah brightens up the day for me to see clearly. Because after all, He would not challenges you with things that you can’t handle. That is FACT number 3.

I come to realise that self-therapy is important to overcome sadness. In a way, I come to understand myself when handling rough situation. I climbed mountains so that I can forget my problems. In a way, it does help a lot. The view at the peak, is priceless. Every step with every hike I did with dhikr, SubhanAllah, Alhamdulillah, Allahu Akbar. To see the world from different perspective, through the eye of a believer, the greatness of its Creator, MashaAllah. FACT number 4.

And, FACT number 5. It is not that I am not thinking of getting married at all. Been getting all this question for at least once a month. Not too bad. But the way I see it, has really changed. I used to think that marriage is a fairytale. You found someone nice, get married, settle down, have children, and all is all. Lovely. But now, finding someone to love, to spend your whole life with, is not that easy. Baking apple pie is way too easy than finding yourself a perfect other half. I truly believe that everything has been written down in Luh Mahfuz. Holy Qur'an states: "They (wives) are an apparel for you, and you are an apparel for them." (2:187). Marriage is a union of souls and I am praying for an ideal Muslim as a husband, and I will try my best to be a good Muslimah and together we will walk down our life to the path of Allah swt. Ameen~ 

From this point on, I will cherish life more than I did before. May Allah bless us all with happiness and Hidayah. Ameen.

Am so happy, Syukur, Alhamdulillah....

 ....overwhelmingly happy and relieved, I even baked cake!

 The Sticky Date Cake, sweet!